Manifesting what you are Worth
As I watch the ways of the world and the underlying motives of the humans around me, I notice that most of our bad decisions come from a lack of self worth. It keeps us hiding in ourselves and shaming and shunning ourselves into further disconnect from those around us.
We can look at the big stuff such as having affairs, lying, making others feel bad, etc. but there are so many little things too. The thing that continues to surprise me is that we often make decisions to do things because we are insecure about aspects of ourselves that no one else even cares about. People around you might even laugh if they knew your "secret" dark side.
How can you manifest what you are worth if you don't know what you are worth and you aren't facing what is blocking you from that knowledge. Self worth is a great place to start in figuring out how you are blocked to manifesting what you want.
The key here is, if we could just face that we feel bad about ourselves and are insecure, rather than constantly running from that feeling through ego boosting activities, we would probably stop creating reasons to feel bad about ourselves. It is the belief that we are no good that perpetuates those actions to lead us to make that judgment to begin with. The chicken and the egg is no debate on this one. We don't make bad decisions because we are bad people; we make bad decisions because we are too afraid to face our fears that we are bad people.
Lets take the playground as an example. A young boy who feels good about himself invites children to play with him. Allowing the other people to also feel successful in their pursuits and encourages the joy of success in others. The boy who is worried about his own worth will often compete or show off talents they think would make others feel inferior too. We have trained ourselves to think the later is “normal.” As normal as it may seem, it is an energetic indicator that this person doesn’t know their worth.
Another example is the corporate ladder. Leaders who feel secure in themselves climb easily and bring others with them. Leaders who feel more nervous or like imposters in their positions often ride on others coat tails and make sure those around them know they are superior. Again, just because the later is more common, doesn’t mean it is the optimized way to be.
If we boost our trust in ourselves, love for ourselves and believe that we are inherently good; we start to make decisions from a more authentic place. Not that controlling, manipulative place that tries to make us look good, but the place that is naturally already good. If we trust it to be there and stop wondering if it is there, we stop second-guessing, stop making choices out of how we appear. We start to do things that boost our self worth, thus perpetuating the cycle of building self worth rather than breaking it down.
There are tons of tools out there these days. Here are a few that I suggest to enhance your self love space.
- Affirmations - Louise Hay has a good daily quote.
- Gratitude of self journal - "I am grateful for myself because..."
- Self love activities - i.e. nurturing body work, baths, self care that means something to you about loving yourself
- Surround yourself with good positive energy that affirms you deserve a positive life.
There are tons of resources out there. Google it and see what resonates with you. Then make it a habit to love yourself more.
If you are an angel person, here is a video from Doreen Virtue.
Stop trying to pretend you think highly of yourself and actually do think highly of yourself. Don't worry about what other people think of you, rather concern yourself with what you think of you. If you aren't thinking highly of yourself, your best bet to having a better life starts there.
How? The first step is to start correcting your own inner dialogue. Catch yourself when you make disparaging comments about yourself (which you probably say out loud too) and correct it to a statement that affirms what you want to be. For example, change "I can't believe I did that, I am so spacey!" to "Wow, I just did that to remind myself to pay more attention. I will gladly take that challenge." By taking on the challenge, you are offering yourself growth and depth in understanding of yourself.
Facebook me if you want me to break this topic down more. It is truly a great place to start the healing process. (or of course comment here)