Believe in Yourself - Transmute Those Insecurities
As far as I can tell, low self-esteem is a real epidemic. People are running around feeling bad about themselves or pretending to be better than others, or both. It causes problems in relationships, anxiety disorders, the inability to make decisions or achieve goals. It brings people to act smug to each other, keep secrets and hold grudges.
Why are we feeling so terrible about ourselves? Don't we all deserve to feel good about ourselves, no matter what anyone else is doing? Let's tackle those insecurities! This is part of that awesome shadow work we could all benefit from doing more of.
What do you say out loud to other people to dismiss their compliments? When someone tells you you are great, what is the first thing you want to say to them or to yourself?
“You are so beautiful today!”
“Oh no, I just threw this outfit on. It’s a fluke.”
This is the first clue as to how you feel about yourself. If you can't accept a compliment from someone else, how are you ever going to accept one from yourself and vice versa?
Also, listen to what you say to others about yourself. What do you say when you make a mistake? What do you say when someone else tells you that you are wrong?
Often times you were told things about yourself by a parent or trusted adult that later became a tape you play in your own head. You take on shame or blame that was projected onto you, that you have now made your truth.
Hidden in those words are subconscious self worth blockers. You can use this awareness to shift things and allow your best self to shine.
Explore Your Gifts
Find things that you are naturally good and and do them often. Allow yourself to feel satisfied using your natural gifts. Humility is a great skill in moderation. Too much humility and you block yourself and everyone else from enjoying what you have to offer.
When you let yourself explore thing things that come easy to you, you allow yourself to be the gift to the world that you are here to be. You have no idea how you impact other people. Your very being may be enough to inspire major changes in other people. Especially when you show up fully and authentically.
Convert the comparisons
Rather than comparing yourself to others and feeling better or worse about yourself because of that comparison, covert that comparison into an observation for yourself. Neutrally decide if that is a reality you would like to pursue, to do something similar to the person you are observing, then commit to doing it, rather than making the other person better or wrong.
For example, if someone is regularly exercising and you compare their habits to yours, rather than feel bad because you don't do it as much, inquire within yourself, "is this something I would like to do more of". Be inspired by their approach to life rather than using it to whip yourself over.
On the flip side, if you see someone doing something you don't agree with or you think you are doing better, rather than see them as worse than you, soften that to different. We all are approaching life in our own way while mirroring reality for others. If we all did it the same, we would be so bored.
When you catch yourself comparing yourself to someone else, take a moment and stop and listen to what desire is really behind that comparison and use it to your advantage.
Stop assuming you are the only one
You are probably struggling with similar issues to those around you. You just might not be opening up to each other about it. You can put yourself in the position of sharing, or reach out and find others that are experiencing what you are through community groups or online communities. There is likely someone out there going through what you are. If you find out that you are not the only one, it helps you release your judgements about it and any fears you might have that people will "find out".
You will be surprised how many people hide their insecurities behind a perfect persona. Is there room in you to allow them to show you their insecurities without judgement or shame? If not, then there probably isn’t room for you to see your insecurities either and you are using your masks to keep parts of you in the shadow.
Try something new or do something you know is hard for you and then praise yourself for the attempt. Remind yourself of your own strength and see what happens next.
Ted Talks are always great for inspiration. There are several on self-confidence worth checking out. It is also worth listening to if you are a parent. There are all kinds of inspirational videos, websites, quotes, etc. out there for you. Reach out and find a reason to love yourself more.
I also have really enjoyed Steve Nobel’s transmission. it is a good way to get the clearings and healings we are needing to continue forward. Here is a healing from Archangel Chamuel below.