“He hit me first!”
Put Down the Judgment Paddle: How to Break Free from the Cycle of Reactivity
The school of life is relentless in its teachings, and right now, I find myself enrolled in an advanced course. The energies are swirling and people are reporting feeling sped up and dizzy. There is a lot of fear and aggression in the air and everyone seems to have an opinion about everyone else.
It’s become painfully clear to me that we have been playing a game of judgment ping pong. Me — someone who preaches about releasing judgment — doing it, too? Yep! My justification? I was only judging you AFTER you judged me! That classic “they hit me first” excuse. But let’s be real—if we all did this, we’d be stuck in a never-ending match of judgment, constantly reacting rather than growing.
And here’s the deeper truth: We keep that paddle in hand because we’re afraid. Afraid that if we don’t hit back, we’ll be left defenseless, vulnerable, and open to more judgment. But does anything positive ever come from fear-based thinking? Not really.
So let’s put down our paddles.
What This Looks Like in Real Life
Imagine you’re talking with a friend about politics. They tell you that your way of thinking is wrong. Your gut reaction? Defend yourself, but not just with reason, you throw judgment right back at them. Suddenly, it’s not a conversation anymore; it’s a battle.
Energetically speaking, your defensiveness has created an imbalance in the communication connection and push back is now required from the other person to reset their energy.
But what if, instead of returning the hit, you simply let it go? What if you noticed their judgment, set a healthy boundary, and moved on? No counterattack, no need to prove yourself right, just an internal knowing that their judgment says more about them than it does about you.
This is about holding your own energy. Staying in your energetic bubble and respecting theirs. Both opinions can be true to a degree and variance is important in our ever expanding consciousness.
Insightful Inspiration
Put down the judgment paddle. You don’t have to send the hit back. Just observe, set boundaries, and move forward. You don’t have to judge someone just because they judged you. Instead, send them love and light, recognizing that their judgment is likely a reflection of their own inner struggles.
If we stop swinging at every judgment sent our way, we might just create a more peaceful world, starting from within.
Meditations to Help You Heal
Do you move through your day on high alert, scanning for what might go wrong before you even let yourself relax? That low hum of unease isn't a personality trait. It's a nervous system stuck in protection mode, an energy field that hasn't been permitted to soften.
This 10-minute guided meditation walks you gently through grounding, breath, and embodied safety cues to help you settle into a felt sense of being held and supported, in your body and in the world around you. You'll reconnect to the earth beneath you, regulate your breath to calm your system, and plant an anchor of safety you can return to anytime life feels like too much.
Whether you think of this as clearing your energy field or toning your vagus nerve, the result is the same: a body and mind that finally get to exhale.
Perfect for: anxious mornings, overstimulated evenings, before a hard conversation, or anytime the world feels like a lot.
🎧 Listen now and remember what it feels like to feel safe again.