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I have often been found saying that you don't have to learn your lessons the hard way, you choose to. This doesn't mean that some bad things don't just happen. But for the most part, the struggles that arrive in our life, especially with other people, often carry a message you have agreed to learn. I believe we agree to teach each other things about the way things work and often times to agree to be pretty hard on us until we do learn it. It is the concept that the message is first whispered, then it is said loudly and finally a ton of bricks are dropped on your head and it is screamed into your ear.
We often dismiss the whispers. Why? Well, it can be for a variety of reasons, but mostly because we are stuck in one way of being. Until we are ready to adopt a new way of being, we tend to try and stick with our standard plans. When something comes along and knocks us off of our axis, we tend to throw our arms up and say "WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!" and finally listen to the answer. Not always though... we might try and still cling to the old way of being, making it even harder on ourselves and daring the universe to knock us over again and undoubtedly it will.
So the question for this blog is really, how do I know what lessons I am trying to learn before I get knocked off my axis? (Correct me if I have the question wrong, but this is the question I am answering.) I don't have an easy answer for you, but I can give you a few tips as your insightful inspiration for the week.
Sometimes however, you just have to experience what you are experiencing (rather than avoid it) in order to learn your lesson. Sometimes even knowing the lesson doesn't teach it to you. It is like telling a child the basic concept of multiplication and then saying go do it, including the entire range of numbers large and small. It is difficult to tell you in a blog how to address this fully and completely because life is the school. But I can give you a place to start so that you can be more aware in your lessons rather than being victimized by them. Use my suggestions as a place to start and then build your own list.
First and formost, go EASY on yourself. You can't expect a baby to know all about the world just becuase they are in it. It takes experiences and perceptions and the ability to self reflect to get the picture and even that isn't the full picture. If you are trying to learn a lesson to avoid the consequences of what you think is coming, you might be missing the point. You aren't learning the lesson, you are trying to manipulate the lesson. :)
Insightful Inspiration of the week
If you are struggling with something right now that you can't quite understand the meaning of, you might be up against a major soul lesson. This is where being present really counts. Because if you are bringing in the past, present and future hypothetical into this issue, you could be clouding the lesson.
First, remember you can ask for help. Guides, Angles, God... what ever you pray to, they listen and they help. So send your love to your higher source (or yourself if you can't quite get beyond yourself right now) and ask for help. Ask for clarity, understanding and the grace to accept the lesson. Then listen for the answer. Notice the world around you and see what messages are trying to come through. Trust that these are your answers, regardless of the form they take.
Second, anchor yourself in NOW. This is where the lesson is being presented. Don't project into the future about the what ifs. Look at what is happening right now. Also notice what is NOT happening right now. Be present with your fears, feelings and thoughts. They are your road map to what you are trying to heal. If you are afraid, ask why. Drill in, find out where this fear is rooted in and allow yourself to ask "is this really happening or do I just think it might happen."
Third, give yourself compassion. You are not going to always know right away why you did something. You may have to just trust that the clarity will come later and right now, you just need to be present to see when the messages come. Beating yourself up for not knowing or being in the situation to begin with only drives the pain and hurt deeper and gives you more to do later.
Finally, don't rush through it. Don't make irrational choices just to hurry up and make something happen. People often try to get out of uncomfortable feelings by rushing through things or asking everyone they know for advice so they can say they "tried" to do the "right" thing. Remind yourself that this too shall pass and ride the wave the best you can.